For American Idol/Taylor Hicks Fans

I received an email today from Chris, who writes:

Snark,

You may already know that this morning, Taylor Hicks belted a couple songs for the Wal-Mart shareholders in Bentonville, Arkansas, and we were able to get an okay to make the performance available online. It was live this morning but now it's up and posted.

Here's the link to the video of Taylor Hicks singing live this morning. I think he dad an amazing job. Real star quality.

http://www.walmart.com/exclusiveperformances

Here's the big news, though.

Lee Scott, President and CEO of Wal-Mart, said that after Taylor Hicks' performance, he met with the merchandising people and they doubled the order of his CD.

Cheers,

Chris

He actually has a page on his own website dedicated to "American Idol". It's pretty cool; check it out at http://chrisabraham.com/american_idol/.

Pretty big news for Taylor Hicks...I've only watched "Idol" a few times this year but he seems super-talented.

Stupid Little Things

- Oprah Winfrey has been signed for $12 million by Simon and Schuster to write a book on weight control. This seems like asking Scott Petersen to write about marriage commitment.

- Jennifer Lopez is producing a new reality show for MTV (as if they need another one) called "Moves," about six dancers trying to make it big. The show will air this winter.

- Tonight on MTV, meanwhile, is the series premiere of "The Hills," which follows "Laguna Beach" first season alum Lauren Conrad (aka LC) as she moves to Los Angeles and becomes an intern for Teen Vogue. I'll probably be obsessed with this show like I was with "Laguna," but I would just like to state the obvious that it's not like LC would have gotten the internship if she wasn't famous...also, I just got my Teen Vogue in the mail last week, and guess who's on the cover? Uh-huh.

- California is now considering a bill to make it illegal for a child under the age of 1 to face forward in a car (hello, Sean Preston). The New York Daily News is calling it "Britney's Law." Hee, hee.

- Cate Blanchett is going to play Bob Dylan in an upcoming biopic. I know she's ugly, but she most certainly doesn't resemble Bob Dylan.

- After being sentenced to 60 days in jail for violating parole on her drunk driving sentence, "Lost" star Michelle Rodriguez was released from prison after serving 4 hours and 27 minutes because of overcrowding. I wonder if she's still moving to France?

- Despite trying to work out their problems, Hilary Swank and Chad Lowe have announced that they are divorcing. I'm not going to say anything nasty because I am actually saddened by this news.

- The New York Post and Star report that Jake Gyllenhaal and Natalie Portman went on a date in NYC's West Village restaurant The Spotted Pig on May 22, and that he gave her a dozen pink tulips. If this is true, I've found a new celebrity couple obsession.

Just So You Know

I'm not posting anything about Paul McCartney and Heather Mills getting divorced. (Well, aside from this). I'm already sick to death of hearing and reading about it, and it is what it is: a divorce. Whee. Go read about it on ten million other gossip blogs or just pick up any tabloid in the supermarket. Same with the whole Charlie/Denise/Heather/Richie debacle. I'm sick, sick, sick of it and unless someone gets married or chops someone's head off with an axe, I'm not posting any more on it.

Love,
Me

A Few Photos

Petra Nemcova and Bruce Willis at Cannes. Bruce looks like a pimp. And bare feet gross me out. I don't know why. I just have a thing with people touching my feet. I think I just hate feet in general. Anyway, I digress. Is she REALLY dating him? Gahhhh. I keep hearing that she's either dating him or James Blunt. Oh well. Whoever she's with, she deserves to be happy, I guess. (Pssst, choose James!!!!)



Laguna Beach star Kristin Cavallari and her new boyfriend. I want to know who he is! Does anyone know?



Al Pacino selling lemonade with his 5-year old twins. This is adorable. I wish Al Pacino was my dad. My parents never let me sell lemonade. They thought it was tacky. Plus, it would just be cool to have Scarface and the Devil as your dad.



J.Lo shopping with Leah Remini in LA. (Who knew they were friends?)

"My Fair Brady"s Wed

From the Internet Movie Database:

"Reality TV stars Christopher Knight and Adrianne Curry were married on Monday evening in the bride's hometown of Joliet, Illinois. The couple exchanged vows in front of 250 friends and family during a traditional ceremony at the Christ Episcopal Church. Curry wore a custom-made cream colored Alvina Valenta gown and carried a bouquet of black roses. Her seven bridesmaids wore red evening dresses, while Knight and the groomsmen wore matching tuxedos. Knight, who starred as Peter Brady on the 1970s hit The Brady Bunch, met Curry, who won the first season of America's Next Top Model, when they filmed VH1's The Surreal Life in 2004. Among the guests at the wedding were former Brady Bunch co-stars, Barry Williams, Susan Olsen and Mike Lookinland, as well as their Surreal Life co-star Joannie Laurer. Last year, VH1 chronicled the couple's courtship on the reality show, My Fair Brady. Their wedding has been documented for another VH1 show, My Fair Brady Wedding Special, which will air in July. The couple fooled the press into thinking they were marrying on Saturday."

I actually love this couple. I loved the first season of their show and definitely intend on watching the second. They are so cute together. One quibble, though: Black roses?

Quote of the Week

"I thought it was like a hut. And then it's the Four Seasons, and they rented the whole thing. Is that really roughing it?" - David Spade to US Weekly on Brangelina and their African hideaway in Namibia

It's not quite the Four Seasons, but it's close...
The Burning Shore

Britney's Horrendous Poem in its Entirety

I now realize that in the last post, I put up only part of Brit-Brit's creative diarrhea. Here's the whole thing for those of you that are interested.

P.S. I still think it's about K-Fed.

Remembrance of Who I Am

No more chains
That you gave me.
Enough of pain
Now I'm craving
Something sweet, so delight
How do you stand sleeping at night?

Silly patterns that we follow
You pull me in
I'm being swallowed.
By the ones you think you love
They pull you down
You can't see up above.

Manipulation is the key
They screw it in
Because you're naive.

You come to me now
Why do you bother?
Remember the Bible
The sins of the Father.
What you do
You pass down
No wonder why
I lost my crown.

You don't see me now
You ask yourself why
My crown is back
And it's way too high
For you to be in my presence
Especially my son
You should bow down
I've only just begun.

The guilt you fed me
Made me weak.
The voodoo you did
I couldn't speak.

You're awakening
The phone is ringing.
Resurrection of my soul
The fear I'm bringing.

What will you say
And what will you do?
She's not the same person that you're used to.

You trick me one, twice, now it's three.
Look who's smiling now
Damn, it's good to be me!

*This is for everyone who thinks they know me...

- from her website

THE BRANGELINA BABY IS HERE! And, Oh, Yeah, Gwen's.

What is with celebrities giving birth in bumper crops? First it was TomKat and Brooke Shields, now it's Brangelina and Gwen Stefani.

Yesterday marked the birth of - get ready - Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt. Whew. It's a girl, by the way, and no further information has been released, but InTouch Magazine had reported earlier that Angelina was scheduled to have a caesarean section, although nothing was wrong with the pregnancy. It also said that she had planned to give birth in an African hotel (read: idiot), but doctors informed her that she'd be better off in a hospital. Obviously. Well, congratulations are in order for the gorgeous couple - I hope they realize that somewhere Jennifer Aniston is off crying.

Gwen Stefani also had a caesarean section, but a day earlier - giving birth to her first child with husband Gavin Rossdale, a boy named - get ready - Kingston James McGregor Rossdale. Whew. He weighed 7.5 pounds at birth, for those of you who care, and that's all thats being released from their camp. The baby was delivered at Cedars Sinai Medical Hospital in California.

These are two of the most geneticially blessed babies EVER.

The Soap Opera That is Britney Spears' Life: Part 1

According to the several sources, Britney has finally had it with K-Fed after returning from New York this week to find him once again drinking and smoking pot in their California mansion. The gossip is that Federline has been banished to a section of the basement because their relationship has become so strained. Reportedly, Spears was planning on holding out on a divorce until the birth of their second child, (due in October), but she can't take Kevin's general douchebaggery anymore, and who could blame her? This news comes after she posted a cryptic poem on her website that seemed to attack Federline:

“No more chains/ That you gave me/ Enough of pain/ Manipulation is the key/They screw it in/ Because you’re naïve/You come to me now/ Why do you bother?/ Remember the Bible/ The sins of the father/ What you do/ You pass down/ No wonder why/ I lost my crown/ You don’t see me now/ You ask yourself why my crown is back/ And it’s way too high/ For you to be in my presence/ Especially my son/ You should bow down/ I’ve only just begun.”

Strangely, the poem is no longer on her site, which makes me wonder if her PR people made her take it down. Speaking of PR, a representative for Britney refused to deny or confirm the reports that her marriage is over, and you know what that means...Brit-Brit and K-Fed are no more. Thank goodness.

TSOTIBSL: Part 2

Madame Tussaud's House of Wax in New York City is even adding their support to the online "Bring Back Britney!" campaign by re-unveiling a "Britney 2000" figure that pictures the fallen pop icon as she was at the beginning of the millenium - hanging upside down from a pole, slender and complete with - that's right - heaving animatronic breasts. The museum describes the sculpture as "pre-baby and pre-Federline." The website for the campaign features an online petition and proclaims, "We will not sit silently as she sullies her persona in the public eye; that of a Kabbalah chasing, non-seatbelt wearing, ovary farm for any two-bit backup dancer to take advantage of...we must reclaim our national treasure, rescue her from the racks of grocery store newsstands, and put her back on the stage where she belongs...soaking wet with a live beast draped about her." I totally agree and everything, but didn't she already give up Kabbalah and say that her kid is her religion? Oh well, tomato, tomahto.

On the Set of Paris' New Video

Of course, this wouldn't be a Paris Hilton production without the accidental exposure of some boobage...



Ew, she has old woman tits.

Celebrity Candids

What the hell is Keira wearing on her head?



I'm sorry - good for Kelly Osbourne that she lost all the weight and everything, but the girl is FUGLY.



Forget Britney - Jamie Pressley looks like she's made out of wax. Yikes.



Kate Moss seems to be having a bit of a bad day.

Nicole Richie Eats Something

Too bad it doesn't have any calories or nutritional value.

Gwen is Weird

From The Daily Mirror;

"WHILE most mums-to-be spend their last month of pregnancy with their feet up, knitting little booties, No Doubt's Gwen Stefani is still out par tying... in a wheelchair.

We're told the No Doubt singer is planning turn up to the Guilty Pleasures night at Koko in Camden, London, tomorrow night in a strange-looking electric wheelchair so she can sit down and move around easily.

Now we know Gwen, 36, likes to look a bit kooky, but this wheelchair idea, as we've mocked up here, is her most eccentric yet.

Our mole also tells us that Gwen and her 16-strong entourage have asked for the club's side entrance to be roped off just for them, and a ramp put in place - just in case the tot makes an early appearance and she needs a quick exit.

What next - air ambulance on standby? She's having a baby, not delivering a nuclear missile!"

Um, if I was disabled, I'd be kind of pissed about this. If she's so concerned about having her baby and being safe and all then she should just stop going out to clubs no?

I'm Baaaaaack!

Sorry for the long delay (as I'm sure MANY of you out there have been eagerly awaiting my return <----- *sarcasm*), but now I'm back and well-rested and just full of juicy gossip to share with the public. Sometimes a girl just needs a break, you know? Now if only the weather would cooperate up here in New York. I've got my brand-new Gucci belt-buckle sunglasses, my frosty new margarita glasses from Pottery Barn, an unopened bottle of Australian Gold tanning spray, and a fresh pedicure all raring to go for a round of sun worshipping. Only problem is, it's 50 degrees here! Yikes! Wind, wind, go away - time to soak up the sun!!
Leave me some comments or drop me an email - I'm always looking for link exchanges! Toodles.
XOXO

Madonna's Latest Controversy

Here's a picture from Madonna's latest tour to promote her CD, "Confessions on a Dance Floor." She's "nailed" to a mirrored disco-ball cross and sports a crown of thorns while singing her classic hit, "Live to Tell." Personally, I think Madge has run out of ways to attract the media - she's not hot anymore, her body looks old, and she has basically done everything under the sun to get their attention - so she's really pulling out the last stops with this crucifix thing. Madonna comparing herself to Christ?! Blasphemous! If nothing else this will get all those devout Christian groups riled up, so I guess she's accomplished something.

J-Lo Pregnant?

InTouch is reporting that Jennifer Lopez is three months pregnant after seeing a small bump and gray roots in her hair at the ALMA Awards in LA on May 7. A Socialite's Life Miu Von Furstenburg also confirms the rumors, citing an anonymous tip. Lopez told the Miami Sun-Herald's Jackie O, "No comment. I'm not even going to acknowledge that rumor," which seems fishy when compared to previous interviews in which she has flatly denied pregnancy rumors. I guess we'll have to wait and see...if this does turn out to be true, I'm really happy for her and Marc. She has expressed so many times in interviews her desire to beome a mother and it would be nice. Plus, I cannot wait to see the clothes the baby would wear. Swaddled in Louis Vuitton, no doubt. Anyway, if all the hullabulloo turns out to be true and she is three months along, the baby should be due in December. Merry Christmas, J-Lo!

Jessica, Au Naturel

No makeup or hair extensions. Keep using that Proactive, kid.

NOOOO KIRSTIE DON'T DO IT!

Kirstie Alley breaking her diet by going to In-n-Out Burger.

Fashion Police!

Maybe Jen got this top in hopes that it will lure Brad back to her because it looks like she either bought it in Africa or made it out of silly string. I'm disappointed in you, Jen - you usually make sensible fashion choices - but this is just all wrong. Ick.



Um, yeah, ick again. Except this time I'm not surprised. Why does she always do her hair like a poodle, though? It seems rather out of character.



Bai Ling on her yacht at Cannes. How does she get a yacht? And how does she think she looks good when she looks in the mirror every day?



Kim Cattrall has really gone downhill since leaving "Sex and the City". She looks like a soccer mom with that hair now instead of a hot mama. What's with her boobs? They seem to be going south really fast. She needs a push up bra...or a breast lift.



Last but not least, Mariah Carey making the same fashion mistakes as always: too short, too bright, and too tight. This is really unflattering on her, especially since she's made a big to-do about her recent weight loss. The pink satin makes her look heavier than ever.

Are Jen and Vince in Trouble?

From Star Magazine:

"The sexy spark between The Break-Up co-stars Jennifer Aniston, 37, and Vince Vaughn, 36, may have ignited during shooting of the comedic film last year in Chicago, but judging by the duo's behavior at the film's world premiere on Monday in Westwood, Calif., that spark has lost its sizzle — big time!

The first clue of trouble in paradise? Aniston, who looked stunning in a sleeveless, body-hugging creme striped knit dress, arrived at Mann Village Theater around 7:30 pm — solo! Vaughn, who wore a simple black suit and light blue shirt, arrived about 15 minutes later.

The second clue? On the red carpet, Vaughn stayed about ten steps behind Aniston at all times.

Towards the end of her stroll down the red carpet, Aniston — who's bracing for the impending birth of Angelina Jolie's baby with her ex-husband Brad Pitt — startled her publicist when she darted across Broxton Street to sign autographs for her fans. Jen spent quite a bit of time mingling with the crowd, to the point where her seemingly nervous minder was overheard saying, "We've got to get Jen inside before Vince gets down." Hmm...

Aniston then scooted inside the theater and, as if it was a well-orchestrated maneuver, Vaughn crossed Broxton Street to take his turn at working the crowd. The screening was delayed by fifteen minutes so that Vince could spend time with the fans."

More News About Brangelina *yawn*

From In Touch Weekly:

"In Touch has learned that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have given the right to name their baby to the governor of the Erongo region of Namibia, where they are currently living and plan to give birth..

The governor, Samuel Nuuyoma, has gotten close to the couple since their arrival seven weeks ago, and is expected to give a press conference on Friday to brief the media further.

"It's true. This is a great honor for Namibia and everyone is very excited," a government official for Namibia told In Touch .

It is not known what name the governor plans on giving the baby or whether it will be a traditional Namibian one.

Nuuyoma has said that when Angelina goes into labor, any day now, he will go there and name the baby.

In the time Brad and Angelina have been in Namibia, Nuuyoma has dined with the couple, who are interested in helping out in the area."

Oh, yeah, and in other news, Brad can't go to the Cannes Film Festival to promote his movie "Babel," because Angelina's going to pop that sucker out any day now.

I really am sick and tired of Brangelina. So they're a gorgeous couple with gorgeous kids and they do wonderful charity work. Blah.

Brandon Slams Lindsay

Here's the video of Brandon Davis pretty much trashing Lindsay Lohan while Paris Hilton giggles like an idiot in the background and refuses to comment.

For those of you that just want to know what the hell Davis had to say, and I'll admit, it's pretty funny in a drunken way, here is my own written transcript of Brandon's slurs:

"Lindsay Lohan has got the skankiest, sweatiest, orange cunt anyone has ever seen. I haven't seen it, she wants me to see it, but it's orange, and it fucking smells like diarrhea, so fuck off. And who would want to fuck her? Who? Wilmer? First off, is he in a mariachi band? We don't care. and she's got a fire crotch and all you guys then of course suck because you're desperate. Fuck you you fucking whore. Lindsay Lohan is a fire crotch. Ok, just tell me the truth...Lindsay Lohan? Would you fuck her? Her dad's hotter than her, alright? We think she's a fire crotch. I mean, we don't think that, we know that, it's obvious. Red pubic hair comes from inside her. She's like an orange tree. Fire crotches' movie bombed. Fire Pussy. Fire Weiner. I think she's worth about seven million, which means she's really poor. Its disgusting. She lives in a motel. We're gonna leave you with these last words. Lindsay Lohan? Fire crotch. She has freckles coming from inside her vagina, and her clitoris is seven feet long."

That last claim is pretty outrageous. Still, I am cracking up picturing Lohan dragging her seven foot clit behind her at premieres. Oh, me.

Kenzie Dalton a Finalist in Modeling Competition

Here's Chad Michael Murrary's child bride, Kenzie Dalton, modeling at Mansion Nightclub in Miami Beach, Florida on May 20 in the "So You Want to be a Model" finals. In the second picture you can see Nicky Hilton and Niki Taylor posing with the winner, Elizabeth White. I wonder if this is going to become a television show or something? Look closely in the first picture and you can see that Dalton's wearing her engagement ring.



And heeeeere's the happy couple...and I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

New Couple? Petra Nemcova and James Blunt

Reported here last month, it now seems that the New York Post is onto the blossoming relationship between supermodel Petra Nemcova and British singer/songwriter James Blunt. After being spotted together at several nightclubs last month, the Post reports that Petra would only play Blunt's "Back to Bedlam" CD at a recent photo shoot for Rampage. When asked about Blunt, Nemcova would only say, "Oh, I know him very well." She was also spotted backstage during his set at the Coachella music festival in Indio, California.

Kidman and Urban Solidify Wedding Plans...

According to MSNBC, lovebirds and fiancees Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban are planning to get married without a prenuptial agreement (mistake number one!) and have selected a date and location for the big event: June 25, in Sydney, Australia, which makes sense for the Aussie natives. Reportedly singing at the ceremony will be Bette Midler, on hand to perform the couple's "special song," "Wind Beneath My Wings." (mistake number two!) If there was a song called, "I'm So Glad I Can Wear Heels and Don't Have to Put Up With All That Scientology Crap Anymore," I'm sure that would be their "special song" instead.

..While Nicole and Adam's Fall Apart.

Despite reports (from Lionel Richie among others) that they are planning their wedding, Nicole Richie and fiancee Adam (DJ AM) Goldstein have officially separated once more. Richie's publicist issued this statement for the couple yesterday: "We are confirming that we have amicably separated." Different reports are coming in from several sources, who insist that Goldstein became tired and disenchanted with Richie's struggles with her alleged eating disorder. Her behavior was apparently getting worse instead of better, and her partying was again becoming out of hand.

Britney's Bad Week

After seeing these recent pictures of Brit Brit bungling things up with her baby (notice the way the carseat is facing...)





...I was totally prepared to call her a lousy mother like I did with the high-chair scenario. But then I saw this picture, which was snapped right after she almost dropped Sean Preston...



...and I feel nothing but very, very sorry for her. I also feel like a dirtbag for wanting to drag her in the mud like everyone else.

Taking a Break...

I'll be back by the end of this week or (at the absolute latest) the beginning of next week! Leave me comments!

xoxo

Mischa's Fugly New Haircut

Ewwww. We are not impressed. Hate the solid red color (looks much more red in the back, by the way) and the dark streaks in the front. Hate the shorter layers...basically just hate it. I loved Mischa's hair when it was brown and highlighted and gently wavy.
What do you think? And furthermore, could this mean she is the one leaving the cast of "The O.C."? Since taping is over, she can do whatever she wants now with her hair. Hmmmm...

CaCee Quits Jessica

US Weekly has more scoop on the possible CaCee-Nick-Jessica triangle:

"After more than two years as Jessica Simpson’s personal assistant, CaCee Cobb finally told her childhood friend that she wanted out. On May 7, Cobb celebrated her last day on the job with friends at Arnie Morton’s Steakhouse in L.A. Fighting tears, Simpson, 25, raised her glass and said to Cobb, “You are my best friend. I will be your best friend forever.” Simpson’s rep confirms the professional parting of ways to Us, “It’s true. They remain close.”

Or do they? Once she gave notice, Cobb, 28, didn’t waste time before catching up with her boss’ ex, Nick Lachey. Last week, Cobb met Lachey at L.A. hot spot Shag and cornered him into a half-hour conversation, according to an eyewitness. “CaCee’s still really close with Nick and adores him,” says a source, who adds that Cobb has felt pressured to pick sides in the couple’s divorce wars."

Yeah, we'll see how long they remain bff!likeomg! when CaCee and Nick start sucking face in public.

Nobody Nose

Before After

Ashlee Simpson is an idiot. She should just admit that she got a nose job, because it's not like the bump on her schnozz just magically disappeared. When questioned about it by the Associated Press, she responded, "Everybody's already saying it, so I just don't talk about it. I'm like, okay, whatever. It doesn't bother me." When further pressured to give less vague of an answer, Ashlee started giggling hysterically and replied, "Maybe...who knows!"

Um, obviously you do, dumbass. Other people that know? Your family (Joe probably forced the issue), your doctors, everyone that has seen you before your *ahem* possible rhinoplasty. It looks good, so just say you did and avoid scandal the level of (well , not quite) SNL and the scary jig.

It's Official!

From Star Magazine:

"Britney Spears, 24, confirmed to David Letterman during a taping of the The Late Show on May 9 that she is indeed pregnant with her second child with husband Kevin Federline, 28. Britney brought her 8-month-old son Sean Preston to the taping. Britney's admission confirmed Star's report in its Feb. 13 issue — which landed on newsstands on Feb. 1 — that she was expecting. Thanks, Brit!

Earlier this month, a source at the Dance for Kids studio in Malibu, Calif., told Star that Britney, who while teaching a session, apologized to the energetic kids for not keeping up, explaining, "I'm pregnant!" And while on a break, the source says Britney let slip to one of the moms that she's already four or five months along. "

I hate it when celebrities make everyone play the guessing game...espcially Britney because it was SO OBVIOUS she was expecting. The Feds are really working their way to trailer-park territory...but if I'm not mistaken, isn't that where Brit came from in the first place?